Tag Archives: Rated PG-13

Batman (1989)

Batman Quote: “I now do what other people only dream. I make art until someone dies. See? I am the world’s first fully functioning homicidal artist. ” – Joker

Sometimes, a podcast episode comes along and ruins your entire childhood. This recap of Tim Burton’s 1989 “Batman” is that episode. Give us an hour, and we’ll convince you Michael Keaton was a ridiculous Dark Knight, Jack Nicholson was an unoriginal Joker, and journalists really aren’t bad. On the bright side, Prince did put together a stellar soundtrack, and Kim Basinger is undeniably at the top of her game. Continue reading Batman (1989)

Goldeneye (1995)

Goldeneye Quote: “You know, this sort of behavior could qualify as sexual harassment.” – Miss Moneypenny

“Goldeneye” gave us a new James Bond in Pierce Brosnan and type of villain with Alan Cumming’s Boris The Hacker. But the 1995 blockbuster missed a Golden opportunity to reinvent a franchise that was long overdue for some growing up.

Sure, there were highlights: a sadistically sexy Famke Janssen as Xenia Onatopp, another Sean Bean death and a cameo by Minnie Driver. However, the improbable stunts, goofy gadgets, sexism, misogyny were too much for this movie to overcome.

At least there was the video game. Man, that was a fun game. Continue reading Goldeneye (1995)

Twister (1996)

Twister Quote: “The Suck Zone. It’s the point basically when the twister… sucks you up. That’s not the technical term for it, obviously.” – Dustin Davis

“Twister” gave us all a horrifying glimpse into a world where the United States doesn’t have any politically correct superpower enemies. Left with no face for our fears, director Jan De Bont made weather itself the enemy, and not even a star-studded cast including Bill Paxton, Helen Hunt, Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Cary Elwes could save the resulting shatstorm.

If you were thrilled by this movie years ago or have warm feelings for the late Bill Paxton, let us teach you to hate everything about this movie … with good cause. Continue reading Twister (1996)

Raising Arizona (1987)

Raising Arizona Quote: “He explained to us that Edwina’s insides were a rocky place where my seed could find no purchase” – H.I.

“Raising Arizona” introduced the world the Coen brothers, Holly Hunter and Tempe, AZ. It also empowered John Goodman to truly display his abilities. But most of all, it showed us how funny Nicholas Cage could be.

Infinitely quotable and impressively shot by Barry Connenfeld, “Raising Arizona” is a 1987 time capsule that hasn’t aged a bit. It’s every bit as funny now as it was when we were kids.

Gene wrote this and isn’t at all biased by his 25 years as an Arizona resident. Continue reading Raising Arizona (1987)