All posts by Dick Ebert

Blade Runner (1982)

Blade Runner Quote: “I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched c-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.” – Roy Batty

“Blade Runner” should be a classic sci-fi masterpiece. Should be. Ridley Scott directed it. Philip K. Dick wrote it. Harrison Ford, Rutger Hauer, Daryl Hannah and Edward James Olmos brought it to life.

“Blade Runner” brought dystopian aesthetics to life for American audiences in a way we’d never seen before. And it totally sucked.

Before you cancel your Shat The Movies subscription in disgust, hear us out for an hour. If you could stay awake through “Blade Runner,” you can sit through this.. Continue reading Blade Runner (1982)

The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

Shawshank Redemption Quote: “I believe in two things: discipline and the Bible. Here you’ll receive both. Put your trust in the Lord; your ass belongs to me. Welcome to Shawshank.” – Warden Norton

“The Shawshank Redemption” is one of the finest prison movies ever made, worthy of its 1995 Oscar nomination. But does it hold its own against the other cinematic giants of 1994: “Pulp Fiction,” “Forrest Gump,” “Quiz Show,” and “Four Weddings And A Funeral?”

And why did it cost Gene Lyons his first kiss from the girl of his dreams? Continue reading The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

Pulp Fiction (1994)

Pulp Fiction Quote: “Well, I’m a mushroom-cloud-layin’ motherfucker, motherfucker! Every time my fingers touch brain, I’m Superfly T.N.T., I’m the Guns of the Navarone!” – Jules Winnfield

Some say there’s no such thing as a perfect movie. We say, “You need to rewatch ‘Pulp Fiction.'” Quentin Tarantino’s 1994 quasi-noir masterpiece has earned the first-ever perfect score from Shat The Movies.

The mind-blowing cast includes Bruce Willis, John Travolta, Samuel L. Jackson, Harvey Keitel, Uma Thurman, Ving Rhames, Christopher Walken, Tim Roth, Eric Stoltz, Rosanna Arquette, Steve Buscemi and Peter Greene. The mind-blowing script contains too many quotes to list. Continue reading Pulp Fiction (1994)

Highlander (1986)

Highlander Quote: “I don’t like boats and I don’t like water. I’m a man, not a fish!” – Connor MacLeod

Is “Highlander” the worst ’80s movie? Perhaps. Is it the worst movie Shat The Movies has reviewed? Definitely.

Christopher Lambert can’t act. Sean Connery isn’t Egyptian or Spanish. We still don’t understand why “there can be only one.” The movie starts on a high note with Freddie Mercury belting out Queen’s “Princes of The Universe,” and two very long hours later ends up in the toilet. Continue reading Highlander (1986)